Vivien ♀ Twenty one (21) English Literature Major ✎ A Gleek ♬ I love you like a love song

Don't you just love the word Phantasmagoria? It's long and crazy sounding.

I am bored again. And I probably won't be able to fall asleep tonight (again), because I'm still deciding whether accept NUS or NTU. Or maybe run away to New York and live as a hobo. Yeah not really.

Anyway, cool, I have an anonymous tagboard tagger (whatever you want to call it).

I'm really hungry now. Bye.

NTU or NUS? Comparing the envelopes you can tell that NUS is definitely richer, right? A4 sized envelope and a one-dollar stamp! But you wouldn't go to a University just because it is richer. I think. I read through the instructions and I got a little confused. Okay, more that a little, because you should know the state of my mind right now.

At least there will still be a month to make up my mind.

And you know, because of tomorrow's Speech Day, I have to miss the MICA interview (yes, like, omg, there is an interview. Sob), and the SPH written test. When I replied to the email from SPH I wanted to request for them to remove me from the list of considered people, because it's for the freaking 2010/2011 Academic Year cycle. Which means I have to pay for the first year, and not get a cool free laptop. But then I decided against it, because (i) that's the only scholarship I relatively wanted, and (ii) MOE and MICA may not offer me anything, even after they have wasted my time when I could have been watching Friends or sleeping (which aren't constructive but definitely more fun than travelling to far-flung areas and waiting to do tests).

However I've also been thinking that maybe being bonded to SPH wouldn't be that fun, because they may assign me to write stuff for the Money section, because of H1 econs, and I would just die, because my dream is to have a fun job writing or the Life or Urban sections of the newspaper. I mean, my dream if I were to be a journalist, not my dream per se.

So maybe it'll be better if I worked some random organisation (public or private, I don't really mind either), then quit and join SPH in hopes of working in the fun sections.

But now's not the time to think so far ahead, because I'm usually not one to think far ahead. I mean who knows what will happen? Maybe the world will end because of solar plasma, and then I wouldn't need to care about my career, as I would be facing my untimely demise.

And I'm still dreaming of quitting my job (when I have a job, duh) and travelling around the world on a shoestring budget and visiting cool places like New York, or Paris. But of course this is a romanticised version, because I would probably look like a hobo at the end of the trip.

MOE interview on Monday, majoring in English Literature, with 4 modules in English, whatever that means (Ha! No way they can offer me Country X now!). You know what the funny thing is? I've never ever considered becoming a teacher.

When I was young I used to want to draw Manga/Anime stuff, because I was influenced (HEAVILY) by Sailormoon; I even wanted to go to Poly to take animation. Then I wanted to become an author writing fantasy novels/children's books, because that would be so freaking cool. Then recently I wanted to be a journalist (but only for the fun sections, or those where you go overseas and take really cool photos and write awesome articles on overseas stuff. Photojournalism, or something). Now I'm in the contemplating sleeping my life away (kidding). Right now I don't know what I want to be. Help!

However, no matter how confused I was/am, I never contemplated becoming a teacher. Now even more so, after hearing Xumei's experiences. So how now?

T_T

Digressing, I want to donate blood! I've been obediently ingesting those red Wanse (whatever) pills (which taste like sweets when you suck on the shell, by the way) every single day, and I'm sure my Fe levels would be okay. I hope.

By the way, the links to other blogs are the countries, under the "All Aboard" section. Yes, I changed the skin. :D

I am hungry, I should probably eat lunch now. Bread with Jam and Cheese or instant noodles? Hmm, choices, choices.

Yes, my diet sucks now, I'll probably have chronic hair loss before this year is over. But ciao anyway.

Apparently MOE requires me to take the personality test. So another Saturday is burnt, when all I wanted was to stay at home watching Friends. Instead I have to drag myself out of bed and reach Buona Vista at 10.30.

Why, why, why must the Universe thwart me in such ways?

I'm now on Iron pills because Choo's curse of low iron was transferred to me and Xumei. Xumei's Deferral code is 0007. No that does not give her a license to kill and chop up, it probably just means her iron count is freakin' low.

Which means now Yingyu can join us to donate blood!

Out of boredom recently I bought nail polish in this hideous shade of pink so that I can occupy my time by painting my nails. But the colour is too hideous, haha. Maybe I should try black, since I cannot find gray. Then I can channel all my negative qi to my nailbits. I sound like some hippie who's into one of those alternative therapy things. "Oh, your aura is so green today, you need to drink some grass juice and dance around a bonfire naked under a full moon."

Oh and for Speech Day I have to wear office wear. Why are people obsessed about office wear anyway? It's what's inside that matters, isn't it?

Uh I am just cheesed off that my plans for slacking on Saturday are destroyed. T_T And because NTU hasn't sent me anything yet, when everyone else has gotten their acceptance letters. I am so worried they'll reject me, then I'll have to wait for letters from NUS. Wouldn't it be funny if I went for these interviews and stuff and didn't get into a University?

And wouldn't it be funny if I don't get any scholarship? Then I'd have to use my insurance money (which my parents got from some investment thingy, whatever), and I'd be broke.

Anyway the MICA interview so wasn't an interview (okay, so no one actually said it was an interview). It was this simulation of a day in the life of a MICA employee, and I was unfortunately named Pat, and had to reply to emails, and have a meeting with a colleague, and also do an impromptu powerpoint presentation ("specifically on the psychological impact of social distancing on youth during a influenza pandemic, and what the government can do", they did give me this whole stack of information on Influenza Pandemic, so it wasn't totally based on nothing) to my boss, Sam (who was a woman, anyway).

What PC work Pat had to do.

And my "colleague" was this loser who wanted out from some project ("Special committee for the Singapore Youth Olympics 2010"), and there was this email from "Eric", who was either hitting on Pat ("Hey, remember me? We met at the blahblah something... ...maybe we can collaborate"), or behaving like a truly PC nub whose aim in life was to build up social networks. Of course I replied to his email, since Pat would have felt it necessary to reply to a guy whom she thought might be flirting with her, on the off chance that he would be handsome/rich, and then she could retire, shopping and playing mahjong as a tai-tai while her rich husband worked as MICA's minister. This is what I call "getting into character".

But it was so fun, like play-acting, or playing one of those games where you and your sister pretend to be office workers and professionals, and do work. Well, at least me and my sister used to do that, besides the usual play-cooking, and scooter riding. I'm thinking it would be fun to work as one of those role-players.

And they provided us with snacks like Loaker (spelling?), and also some chocolaty-wafer bar thing. MICA sure is rich, huh?

Okay, I'm out of ideas. Shall go see whether there are places cooler than this $#%^& sofa. Ciao!

PS. I LOVVVVEEEE Fourleaves brownies! Especially when they are like one day old, then they become all soft, like cake.
PPS. Okay, so I am totally bored and out of topics to blog about, so what?

Yay tomorrow is Ben & Jerry's Free Cone Day!

And tomorrow is the interview too. Uh. I just googled for the map to MICA and it is not the prettiest map I've ever seen. Remember how we took bloody long to get to Funan Mall? Well, this place is further off than that from City Hall MRT station. But then again the nice receptionist said it would be a ten minute walk (depending on whether I get lost or not).

I've finished watching White Chicks. At last, after all these years, I am not the only lame-o person who hasn't watched it! And although most of it contains low-brow humour, I am a low-brow humour sort of person, so, haha.

[605.606 failedcook]___ (: says:
we are gg to beat those young punks to ben
and jerry!

No Weilin, we are not that old.

Anyway, I've been thinking about scholarships and stuff. So they'll pay the tuition fees, the book fees, and also the whatever maintenance fees (like, computer and stuff), but there's the four years bond thing, working for a government agency.

I emphasise, a government agency. And not just any government agency, but the one in charge of all the slogans, NE messages, cheesy advertisements, oh my gawd. O_O How can I spend four years doing that? Let's just hope MOE calls me because now I would rather become a teacher. But I don't think MOE wants me, haha.


Although it would be cool, wouldn't it? To create all the slogans and messages to tell the kids, and maybe revamp the whole NE thing so it wouldn't seem so forced (which would be more effective, you know it), then I can brainwash the entire future students of Singapore, muahahahaha. So 1984, don't you think? "2+2=5!"


And that goes against everything I believe in. And yet who says no to money if it falls from the skies (with strings attached, of course. Strings attached to the money which pulls you to places you may not wish to go). Too bad the SPH scholarship person emailed me saying the 2009 cycle(?) is closed liao T_T, and told me I still can go for the 2010/2011 cycle and then told me I could still go for the written test.

I have a bruise on my middle-finger joint. My fringe is covering my eyes. I am not going overseas to study. I don't know whether I want the scholarship or not (assuming, first, that they want me). And I don't know what to do in the future anyway. And change is in the air, you can smell it, can't you?

But that is another topic for a sad blog entry if I'm feeling emo. Not now because I am watching Mind Your Language and it's funny enough to prevent me from feeling emo. And because tomorrow is Free Cone Day!

Saturday was really fun. Uh, yeah, this is a sidenote. Anyway, I've fallen in love with Monopoly after years of not playing it (well, not counting the time Sokemay, Chip and I played). And it's really fun to just hang out at someone's house, talk crap and eat junk food once in a while. I'm a sucker for these "hang out with friends" things. You get the warm fuzzy feeling (which, by the way, has nothing to do with the %$^&ing weather and our oily faces), and you just feel so loved when you are among your friends.

I guess I shall go now. Because it's so freakin' hot and my laptop is radiating and convecting heat. Bye peeps.

No, the title doesn't really make sense. It's just that the song is blasting on this playlist mp3 thing now.

Oh I just realised you can click on the picture in the previous post to view it in it's full glory!

Coolios.

Anyway MICA has this super crazy interview/test thing. How is it super crazy you ask (shh, just pretend you asked. I have to tell someone how super crazy it is)? Well, this is what the nice receptionist girl sent me:

The AC Exercise will comprise 3 exercises:
a) In-tray Assessment - candidates will be required to respond to a series
of short scenarios
b) Presentation Interaction - candidates will be asked to prepare a short
presentation based on a given topic
c) Discussion Interaction - candidates will be asked to prepare for a brief
discussion based on a given topic

No, I don't think they will want me after all those. You know I'm not the most eloquent/impromptu-speech person around. Well, at least I can dress casually (as mentioned in the email from nice receptionist lady). But but but, the test thing is 3 hours (and 15 minutes, but who's counting?) long.

Then again, the receptionist (I really don't know what's her job position, though. Secretary?) seems really nice and friendly, so working for MICA shouldn't be soul-sucking-ly bad, which makes me more interested in it. I mean, she signed off the email with "Thanks :)", and her first name. How cute is that? Not many people do that. Which led me to the "non-soul-sucking" hypothesis.

Too bad the interview/test is so crazily difficult, huh?

And I don't even know who I'm trying to convince anyway.

I think I better go read up on MICA because until the nice receptionist called me, I never knew the acronym stood for Ministry of Information, Communication and Arts. I mean, I knew it had something to do with Arts, and media and stuff, but I never really know the actual name. But now I do.

Okay, I really need to go read up on that. And find out exactly where their office is. Because the email said Esplanade Room, and I would stupidly assume it's at the Esplanade, but on second thought it is highly improbable because the nearest MRT station is Clarke Quay. Gah.

Choo was telling me how the interviewers asked her whether she minds going to COUNTRY X (no prizes for guessing it right, though) for Uni.

Mooooooo.

Would you go?

Call me prejudiced, but I sure as hell wouldn't. I mean besides the whole language barrier and the pollution and the fact that I am completely averse to some of the crude behaviour of some X-se, which I have seen in the form of my neighbours. I mean, having shouting matches in the middle of the night? Obnoxiously loud voices? What the heck is that all about?

Yes, I am being mean and bitchy, but really!

I am really sleepy now, but I bet once I switch off the lights and the laptop I would be freakin' wide awake. D: One night I had this dream that I was super late for Speech Day (it was like 8.59), then my father rushed me to school in one minute, then i had endure super boring speeches, and somehow I remember Yingyu saying she used to go to Speech Day super late and Yunxuan was agreeing, and it was just really surreal. Somehow the auditorium was the size of a dollhouse, and the stage was really small.

See you guys tomorrow! Yay, there's Friends tomorrow!

Oh oh, I wanted to blog about how my Aunt came back from Turkey and bought Turkish Delights. Those are delightfully sweet (or cloyingly sweet, if you happen to eat more than one. Seriously), and probably contain 100000 kcals, but who cares, right? Argh my Aunt has the financial freedom (single, no kids, no electric/water bills--since she stays with us, which is a source of irritation for me since my mother's always complaining about how she..uh, forget it zzz--, crazy savings) to travel. All the time. T_T

But then again she's living with us, which cannot be all that fun. I mean, there's my mother, and me (staying in a same house with me cannot be all that fun) and the fact that she cannot be alone most of the time.

Next time I'm going to get my own apartment and I'll finally get some alone time. You don't know how irritating it is to not be able to be alone when you want to. This morning I wanted to read alone in some corner, but the living room was occupied by my aunt (technically she just occupied one sofa, but she was in the room, so...), the master bedroom was occupied by my mother, and my aunt's room was my aunt's room (it would be weird for me to lie on her bed and read, haha), and my room was bloody hot. So I had to go to White Sands to get some alone time (ironically it probably had twenty times more people) among all the strangers.

I think this I-want-to-be-alone-go-away thing stems from how my sister and aunt hate being alone, which makes me love being alone once in a while. I know, I am beyond anal. I love them, but really, would it kill to be alone sometimes? It's so peaceful and you can actually hear yourself think. Which is weird. But a good sort of weird.

And by now you should have realised that I am getting more incoherent by the second, which means I am utterly exhausted and bored of blogging. Because it is 1.43 am now, and I am talking to Yingyu online about travelling, and jobs and stuff. And being so totally broke.

It's nice to have long-ish talks (this isn't that long, since we only started at 12 plus? Or 11 plus. Don't know) about random stuff. :D

But now I've really got to stop blogging. Bye bye bye!

You probably cannot see the masterpiece but this is the highly detailed map to Chip's. I am so cool. You can ask me for it.

Teo Heng was fun. :D And Aston's was cheap and not bad. And cheap. I used to think taste mattered more than price, but not now, apparently. And now the pics uploader is screwing up on me. Boohoo.

Hmm. I wanted to blog about something but somehow I cannot remember what. Oh well. Maybe I never did want to blog about anything after all. Funny how the bored mind works.

Sorry for wasting your one minute or so of time. If you took longer than a minute to read that crap then too bad for you.

Oh, and I finished reading The Two Towers, FINALLY! You don't know how many years I took to complete it. I bought it in 2004 or something, and I've tried to read it at least 5 times, but every single time I try I will end up getting stuck at the part of Wormtongue and the Theoden king and the Ents and I'll be so bored by how long the Ents took to discuss stuff. But not now. No, I have finished the book! I rule! I am the LORD OF THE RINGS!

No, I am not exaggerating my joy; you can tell how this event really plays a large role in my now mundane life, can't you? You cannot believe how shocked I was when I got to the page which read "Book Four". So anyway, I'm now waiting for my pictures to be uploaded. *Twiddles thumbs*

Oh forget it! This uploading whatchacallit screws up more than, uh, a screwdriver. I shall not post any pics then.

And lookie here, I'm out of blogging topics again! See ya later, I'm going to watch Beauty and the Geek on Star World, which is tonnes better that The S Factor (S for stupid? Stupendously bad? Suck-yer-brains-out-with its-pure-badness? So-bad-the-producers-deserve-to-be-neutered?), which isn't saying much. At least the girls on B&G (although they are still occasionally portrayed as being dumb) look good.

I shall go now, bye.

Anyway I was SO overdressed for the interview. There were people who wore jeans, and shorts, and miniskirts. While I sat there looking like an eggplant, there was this girl in a tank top, mini skirt, sneakers and a scarf. I shall never take my friends' advice seriously again, I think.

The Prof who interviewed me was ang moh, and I was wondering whether I should fake an accent, because those who went before me somehow had one of those -_O accents. But I didn't in the end, because I decided it was too gross. It's not like I cannot fake an accent. I can okay! But the interview was not really an interview, the Prof was like, "Don't be intimidated, the Prof at the HASS are very approachable." Or something like that. So it was more of a Q&A session, even though I was all dressed up for a killer interview. So anyway he said the interview was just to see if we really really really wanted to take Lit, because they didn't want to offer a place to someone who would reject them in the end.

You know how I'm not the most enthusiastic person around? So obviously I didn't display an overt interest in Literature. I mean, how to? O_O So I said I chose Lit even though it wasn't pragmatic, which shows my real interest in it (doesn't it?), and he probably thinks I'm a pragmatic prat, even though I don't give a hoot about pragmatism.

Never mind, he said I would be offered a place (even though I don't believe him lah).

And the written test was some poetry analysis thing (or write something about a test/film you once read/viewed). Which was just to see if you could write. I thought they wanted to see all the Lit stuff, and if they did I would be screwed, haha.

Oh, and finding your way there (and out) is NOT the easiest thing to do. And my pumps were killing my feet, so I ended up hobbling my way to another bus stop on the way out. And I had to run for the bus=OUCH.

In the end I couldn't tahan anymore, so I bought a pair of slippers at White Sands, which were velvety, and heaven compared to the pumps/flats, which were hard and tough and UGH. My skin (on my feet) is still peeling as a result of wearing them.

I have to wake up at 6 plus tomorrow to journey to BV (Civil Service College) for the Psychometric Test. I'll be missing Friends zomg. T_T And the test is bloody two and a half hours wtf? And with my current state of brain-usage (approx. 0.10%), I doubt I would be able to do the Math part of the test. Why why why didn't they let EVERYONE go for the Psychotest in Year 6? I mean my results were :P but now I have to go alone early in the morning *sob sob sob*.

Now I don't know if I want to appeal to UC, because I suddenly don't feel like taking Media Studies, which is such a cliche (with the weird e with the tick on it) sometimes. Uh.. hmm.

But I'll probably appeal anyway, since I have to send out so many stuff. Like the MOE documents (siao require so many documents for what? Cannot kup from the PSC one meh? Waste paper wast money kill trees!), the SPH scholarship documents, and, uh, I don't know. But first I need passport photos (why why why does MOE need 2 bloody photos? Why why why?), and I need to decide whether I want to apply for the Creative Industries thing.

And anyway if I'm staying in Singapore why would I want a super long bonding government (like, MOE, or MICA) scholarship anyway? But actually I also don't know the bond periods, and worse, I don't know what MICA is, (shh. I'm going to check it out) because the MICA one was referred from my PSC-rejecto one. I only know MICA is some communications thing? I think?

And and and! I have to go for Speech Day! Of the twelve years of my academic life I have never ever received a remotely academic award before (except in P6 where I almost got full marks for some English NSW test (the $9 one?), and got some high distinction cert, cool sia), and ironically the first award I'm getting in my schooling life (in DHS) will be received after I have graduated. But never mind. The irony still kills me, though.

I cannot wait for Monday, because it's Teo Heng! Teo Heng! OMG YAY AT LAST! :D

Oh, and, people, are you all free next Saturday for the Jiamin/SokeMay/Yunxuan/Biwen Birthday celebrations. Actually it's not a confirmed date. But still, are you free??? O_O

By the way, gotta go, to watch School of Rock. Happy Easter! (If you are a Christian)

It's 12.12am now, and although I have to get up at 6.30am tomorrow to journey to Boon-bloody-Lay, I am not yet feeling the urge to sleep. And it's not like I cannot sleep on the hour long train ride. Thank god/God for small mercies, huh?




Oh, and PSC rejected me at last (which is what I have been telling people, the at last part). I mean, for a government agency they sure are inefficient, no?



I guess I'll go to sleep after packing my bag. Must sleep early, because there is a written test tomorrow. And the interview. Hope I don't freakin' sc rew up.



I think all the Uni stuff is irritating and stressful. T_T

Yeah and that is an inaccurate replica of what I would be wearing tomorrow. With my British Airways bag. Weird, right? And I probably depicted it to look better than what it really is. Hope the interviewrs are colourblind or something. But then again the weird clothes may distract them from my interview. Because it's the visual which makes the most impact, as they always say. :D

Time to bed! Bye.

Got this from Youb, who got it from Krystal. I'm talking to Pung online, while doing this ten things thing. Oh, Pung just left, haha.

EIGHT TENS

TEN "ARE YOU"s
1. Are you single – Yes, if not you think I would be sitting here typing this out?
2. Are you happy – I guess so
3. Are you bored – Oh, no, not at all, I just like doing these meme stuff
4. Are you fair – Skin tone? Yes, and getting fairer by the second, what with all the cooping up at home
5. Are you Italian – No. It would be cool though
6. Are you intelligent - Intelligent enough to exist in this world
7. Are you honest – Yes. I cannot lie even when I try hard. I'll stammer and look dumb
8. Are you nice - Sometimes
9. Are you Irish - Irish Drinking song! Hei dee Dei dee Dei dee whatever. Nope
10. Are you Asian - Yes

TEN FACTS
1. Full Name - Jizzy Tan Chen Chen. Come on, have some creativity, quiz makers!
2. Nicknames – Vivi, Viv, among others
3. Birth place - Singapore, Mt E
4. Hair color - NOT AGAIN? Bright pink with turquoise and black highlights
5. Natural hair style – Bush like
6. Eye Color - Dark brown
7. Birth Date – Sixth December Nineteen-Ninety
8. Favourite hang out spot -Sofa
9. Favorite colors – Grey, white, pink
10. Places you’d like to visit – Europe, California, the world, Venus

TEN THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE (Or, if you want to be brutally truthful, TEN NOTHINGS ABOUT YOUR WHATSIT?)
1. Have you ever been in love - No
2. Do you believe in love at first sight – Yes
3. Do you currently have a crush? – Not now. Sad, huh?
4. Have you ever been hurt emotionally - I guess so?
5. Have you ever broken someone’s heart – I wouldn't know, would I? Probably not, though
6. Have you ever had your heart broken - Nah
7. Have you ever liked someone but never told them – Yes
8. Are you afraid of commitment – Uh, wouldn't know
10. Who was the last person you said I love you to? – Um. I don't know, readers of my blog?

TEN THIS OR THAT
1. Love or lust - Uh, must it be one or the other? If I have to, love
2. Hard liquor or beer - Never had hard liquor, hate beer
3. Cats or dogs - Again, must I choose? Dogs then
4. A few best friends or any regular friends – A few best friends and any number of regular friends
5. Creamy or Crunchy –Creamy! Crunchy sucks
6. Pencil or Pen – Pen. Pen is envy, remember? Which was funny when you realise the dumb allusion
7. Wild night out or romantic night in – Romantic lar. Wild=club (if you're in Singapore, since everyone thinks wild=club here, I guess)=DIE!
8. Money or Happiness –Happiness. See, it's the theory again, if you have happiness you wouldn't care about money anymore.
9. Night or day – Night
10. IM or phone – Phone, even though I am Miss "9 missed calls". No wonder Ruby hated me

TEN "HAVE YOU EVER"s
1. Been caught sneaking out – Uh, from where? I guess not
2. Seen a polar bear – Yep, the Zoo
3. Done something you regret – Yes
4. Bungee jumped – Nope, but would like to try
5. Eaten food that fell on the floor – Uhuh
6. Finished an entire jaw breaker - Jaw breaker=? I have eaten a gobstopper though.
7. Been caught naked – No O_O
8. Wanted an ex bf/gf back - Only if bf stands for broken fingernail, or butter-fried fish. No, I don't even know what that is. I'm just saying, I dont have an ex
9. Cried because you lost a pet – No.. I don't remember how my fighting fish died, since I was like, 5?
10. Wanted to disappear – Sometimes. But I can disappear well enough

TEN PREFERENCES IN A PARTNER
1. Smile or eyes - Smile. If you have a nice smile you probably have nice eyes too but the opposite isn't true sometimes
2. Light or dark hair -Dark, or light, if the light means blonde. I'm a sucker for blondes. Guys, I mean. But if I were a guy I would not want a blonde girl. Probably because of the whole dumb blonde stereotype
3. Hugs or kisses -Both, but kisses more, of course. Shh, I know I am sad
4. Shorter or taller - Taller. I mean, shorter guys? O_O
5. Intelligence or attraction –Uh. Wouldn't want a dumb guy lah. I am biased like that
6. Topman or Zara – Topman
7. Funny or serious - Funny. But not like "Ooh look at me I can eat spaghetti with my feet!" funny. But who does that, right?
8. Older or Younger - Don't mine either way, just not too extreme, like 20 years difference. That is ew
9. Outgoing or quiet – Quiet, I think
10. Sweet or Bad - Sweet. Come on, look at Chris Brown and Rihanna

TEN "HAVE YOU"s
1. Ever performed in front of a large crowd - Yep, Choir
2. Ever talked on the phone for longer than an hour – Yes. :D I like that
3. Ever tried walking on your hands – Hahaha snort
4. Ever been to a rock concert – No T_T
5. Ever been on a cheerleading team – Gimme an N, gimme an O, what does it spell?
6. Ever been on a dance team – Two left feet=?
7. Ever been on a sports team – Uh. No.
8. Ever been in a drama play/production – Cannot act, I think. Although I am ENFP Duh-rah-mah Queen!
9. Ever owned a BMW, Mercedes Benz, Escalade, Hummer or Bentley? -Uh, as if I am that rich. I don't even take driving lessons.
10. Ever been in a rap video? – HAHAHA WHAT?

TEN LASTS
1. Last phone call you made - Uh. I don't make phone calls really, so I cannot tell
2. Last person you hugged -Uh.. Cecilia? Haha
3. Last person you hung out with - My sister singing Disney Songs from Youtube
4. Last time you worked - Eh.. *Sheepish look*
5. Last person you talked to - Sister,
6. Last person you IM’d - Pung
7. Last person you texted - Chip about the Movie Marathon
8. Last person(s) you went to the movies with – Xumei Choo Chip Qbing (Miss "How to get to PS???"), DMC
9. Last person/thing you missed - you? Aww. Really, I don't know
10. Last website visited - Youtube

What? That's it? But it's 1.18 now. Guess it's time to sleep so that I'll have enough energy to shop tomorrow. Shop for work clothes, that is. For the interview, and for some other time I may need them (like, if I get a job...). I've been sleeping at 1 plus lately. When I try to sleep earlier all I get going is some tossing and turning and thinking about random ugh stuff and NOT sleep. Shit, this has got to stop.

Um, seeya, anyway!

Hello hello!

I am back, and I still have nothing to blog about. I am turning into an ultimate stay-at-home movie-geek, because my mother just bought the these VCDs from some sale, including the entire set of LOTR, Charlie and the Choc Factory, and Da Vinci Code. Oh, and The Departed, which is the Ang Moh version of Wu Jian Dao, and M18.

It's mosquito season in my house again. Ugh. I hate bites on the heel area, the fingers, near the lips, or on toes. The worst ones are on toes, which may develop into blisters. But all bites suck anyway. And no, that is not a poor pun on mosquito bites.

I have to go for NTU School of Humanities and SS interview/written test on Wednesday morning. Ugh I have to wake up super early. T_T And besides the whole irritating wake-up-early-drag-butt-all-the-way-to-BLOODY-Boon-Lay thing, I also have to get interview clothes because I asked Youbao and she said for her interviews she wore those stuffy working clothes things. I thought about wearing jeans. Guess not, huh?

So I'm going shopping tomorrow! But boring shopping, for work-ish, serious clothes. But still shopping. I'm going to extort money from my mother tomorrow, like "I need clothes for the interview! Give me money or I will not get into Uni and I will be a slob, forever living off you! Muahaha." Hopefully that works.

Youbao just told me about cheapo work clothes at This Fashion, and the discount card they have! I usually loathe shopping at cheapo places for cheapo clothes (which would explain why I have so little clothes), but desperate times call for desperate measures, I guess.

Just call me El Cheapo.

Now I think NTU really wants students because although I've been shortlisted there, my NUS application is still processing. Ah well. NTU has a cool FASS campus! :D

I want to learn french. Uh, for fun. Then I can go to Paris and chill out at some cool cafe alone while sipping some french coffee. I always thought that was uber cool.

Anyway Youbao, my sight-reading sucks like HELL, and I bet it is ten billion times worst than yours. I remember my Grade 5 (Grade 5 okay! Grade 5 only and I die!) practical exam there was this B-flat or whatever sight-reading thing, then I played the first notes and then completely lost it, and I asked the examiner whether I could stop playing because I couldn't go on anymore. So loser right? I was like, "Can I.." after playing the first notes, then she cut me off, "No, you cannot play it again." because I think she thought I wanted to restart, but instead I told her I wanted to stop playing. D: Then she went, "That bad, huh?", and I nodded, and she said it would get better with more practice. And I never practice anyway, so I never did improve, haha.

Are Choo and Chip going to study in London? Gah so cool! I am struck with foreign fever. Although I haven't appealed to UC to let me in (read: Beg) yet, because I think chances are, they won't, and even if they will I don't think I will be able to get a scholarship which will cover the crazy fees they charge non-Californians/non-Americans. Bah. And why didn't I randomly apply to some UK University? I mean even if I'm too darn broke to consider going there, at least I would have some conditional offers which I qualify for, and then I can at least feel better because a cool foreign University wants me. But nooo, instead I idiotically apply for UC using my idiotic Prelim results, paying $140 instead of the 5 pounds UK Universities require.

Anyway, reading the tags on my tagboard tells me something about my friends. Apart from Yingyu, they all hanker for GH. This makes me sad, and I've decided to ban you all from my house!

Uh, just kidding, don't get you knickers in a knot.

And thanks for the tags, regardless of the GH contents from some. It would have made my day if I actually came online for the past four days or so (and no, I didn't), not because it was particularly touching (not at all, for most part), but because (i) Yingyu likes my song(s)! It's not as irritating as those stupid blah songs right? Yay, and (ii) Most of the tags are lame-o and reminds me that it isn't the end of the world. Whatever. :]

This is turning out to be a reeeaaalllly long post, which is irritating. When I post this it'll probably say 8.30 or something but it's really 10 plus now. It's because I'm very easily distracted on the Internet, by blogs and FB, and stuff. Which makes my entries very disjointed. Too bad.

Right now I can play G, E minor, C, and D chords on the guitar in succession so if you sing YMCA with the guitar it actually sounds in tune. Uh, never mind, haha. And now there're all the pesky Barre chords which are even worse than the B minor chord. At least now I can play that wonkily.

Ahh I am scared I'll screw the interview up. Interviews and me don't go too well. I think. It's not like I've ever been in an interview before. What if they ask me why I want to go to NTU's FASS? What do I say? Because UC rejected me? O_O Because I love reading stuff so I want to major in Lit, and their Lit lessons sound fun? And what was I thinking? Lit? What the hell am I supposed to do next time?

But never mind. :D I'll just make it up as I go along. Like, isn't that what I've been doing all along my entire 18 years anyway?

Uh, anyway, it's 11.54, just for the record. Yunxuan's almost 19.

Oh, and now it's 12.06. She is nineteen. Happy Birthday! -_-

Everyone's turning nineteen. Gosh it'll soon be me. I don't wanna grow upppp!!!!!!! *whines like chip a kid*

Uh, I am officially done here for today. Bye :D

Let's make it four new meaningless posts, then.

I'm in a schlump, and until I get over myself, I think I shall not be blogging in a while. I need a break from my mundane life, instead of logging it in this blog and boring you to tears.

*
Drops of Jupiter-Train

Now that shes back in the atmosphere
With drops of jupiter in her hair, hey, hey
She acts like summer and walks like rain
Reminds me that theres time to change, hey, hey
Since the return from her stay on the moon
She listens like spring and she talks like june, hey, hey

Tell me did you sail across the sun
Did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded
And that heaven is overrated

Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star
One without a permanent scar
And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there

Now that shes back from that soul vacation
Tracing her way through the constellation, hey, hey
She checks out mozart while she does tae-bo
Reminds me that there's time to grow, hey, hey

Now that shes back in the atmosphere
I'm afraid that she might think of me as plain ol' jane
Told a story about a man who is too afraid to fly so he never did land

Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet
Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day
And head back to the milky way

And tell me, did venus blow your mind
Was it everything you wanted to find
And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken
Your best friend always sticking up for you even when I know you're wrong
Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance five-hour phone
Conversation
The best soy latte that you ever had . . . and me

Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet
Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day
And head back toward the milky way

Tell me did you sail across the sun
Did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded
And that heaven is overrated

Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star
One without a permanent scar
And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there

...
*

I love this song, even though I didn't know this song until some girl from American Idol sang it. I am pathetic when it comes to songs which aren't so poppy. And I am pathetic when it comes to other stuff too, but enough of the self-hating, huh?

Bye people, take care while I'm gone. And don't stop checking, because you know how time is relative and I might (may? Ugh, grammar, schgrammar, whatever!) overcome the schlump soon. Or not. Bye. Love ya! (Hate me!)

Self-hating therapy hiatus.

Hello.

I think you are sick of my guitar ramblings.

I hate the Long John Silver's seafood combo advertisement. It just irks me like hell. LIKE HELL. And the ping-pong show sucks ass.

The planning of the Birthday celebrations is going where my life is headed now--nowhere.

I am such a lousy planner.

Maybe this is how it begins, like in the beginning you're all determined that everyone still remains in contact and go out frequently and stuff. Then you start getting caught up with everything (or getting caught up in nothing), and you don't feel that driven to actually plan stuff at all. I mean there has to be a reason friends drift apart right? Everyone has heard of friends drifting apart, and personally I've not heard of friends who stay friends for, like, ever. Especially for a large large large group of friends acquainted on different levels, because inevitably people will get old, and cranky, and tired. Uh, wait, I'm describing ageing. But you get what I mean.

That sucks.

If we were a small group of four or something this sure as hell wouldn't happen. But then again I am not that sure if hell is that sure anyway. And look at what happened to the four of us in primary school; we barely meet once a year. Of course that is better than other primary school friends lar. Which is indescribably sad.

Which is why you need friends you can go out with in small fun groups so you still stay connected, on some level.

And I haven't seen so many people in such a long time. Heck, I haven't seen anyone but in the past few days besides my family, and that is enough to drive anyone sane crazy. I cannot fucking stand how my sister always argues with my mum over some trivial thing, like tuition, or coming home late for dinner. Then my mum, feeling pissed off would get all snappy at me. Like, I didn't fucking do anything? I barely do anything the entire day, so the chances of me actually doing something which pisses people off is almost zero.

Damn I'm so going out tomorrow. Alone. To go find a job at White Sands or something. Or to go for a walk. Anything. I would even settle for digging a ditch in Pasir Ris park. All the better to bury myself in.

Youth is wasted on the young, right? Maybe I'll go do something spontaneous to capture my fading youth, like suddenly go busk in the streets (without a license! Gasp!), go jogging at 3 in the morning (when I don't jog at all? Yeah, right), or randomly kiss girls and make them cry (Georgie Porgie pudding and pie, kissed the girls and made them cry. No I am not coming out of my closet or anything, I'm just being random).

I'm losing my sanity, I'm losing my friends (probably in a painfully slow, unnoticeable way, until years later you wonder where everyone had gone to), I'm losing my patience with me doing nothing, and sitting there while my sister tells my mother about her tuition timings changing, and my mother angrily saying something I don't give a flying heck about. I mean come on, there has to be something more to life, isn't there? I know you can work, and do stuff, and party, whatever, but really, there has to be something more? Or, even if there isn't something more, at least there must be something to keep me busy so that I'll not think about that missing something. Right now all I have is time to think, and be lazy, and schlump around. Heck, I've never felt more useless in my life.

And the thought of going to a Singapore University just makes me sad. Not because they're not up to my standards or anything (believe me, I have no standards, thus Singapore Universities are way way way above my standards, fifth in Asia or whatever it is), but because, uh. I don't know why, but Judy feels the same about studying locally. Maybe because it's just so mundane. Life here is so peaceful, and bland, like every single day is a slow news day. If I ever work in SPH I'd rather work overseas, reporting home, or on the Life! or Urban sections, because if you ask me to report Singapore news, ala Home, honestly, I'd rather stay at home gnawing on my feet.

You see how masterful a writer I've become? I can turn NOTHING AT ALL into something so dreary and depressing. Don't read anymore, this post is just a mood dampener.

And yes, I've had three posts in a day, none of which are remotely fun to read.

Sorry. I guess I've been feeling too much like failure to actually write about anything other than my sad life. I was considering not posting this, but why not spread a bad mood around?

Uh. Maybe I'm just a loser badgering for an ounce of sympathy.

Guitarists have their own notation. O_O

I never knew that. It is so weird to see numbers and strings instead of bars and those towgay notes. And they don't have time signatures which is really, well, really something, I don't know what.

So if you ever need to learn how to read the guitar tab (tablature, where ever that word came from D:), CLICK HERE!.

They gave the tab for Hotel California. I think I would have to die and reincarnate as a guitar god before I can ever play that with my fat fingers. :D Or I would just have to play it on Guitar Hero and be happy with that.

I'm meeting Chip and Choo online to discuss about the long ignored March (and April) birthdays. They're my co-planners now!

Guitars are so cool! There are stuff like movable chords, where you just move a finger on one string from one fret to another then you get another chord! So cool right. Whilst piano you have to move your entire hand. But piano still classier. :D

Anyway now that I know how to play the F chord they have to throw the B minor chord at me. I cannot play that now, boohoo.


Yes I have no life.

My piano is now a temporary (or permanent) shelf (or shelves) for me to put my random junk.



See those bags on the piano chair? Mine. The ones on top of the piano cover are a mish-mash of everyone's random junk. But still partly mine. I shudder to think of the broken strings and the tuning it probably needs if one day someone decides to tinkle (not pee hor!) on the piano. I miss playing it, and I have to say it is easier to play than the guitar. Because I'm Grade 5 on the piano, and also because you won't hurt your fingers playing the piano, no matter how quickly you need to change the chords. Unless you're playing at breakneck pro speeds (which I never try).

So anyway one of the bags dropped today. Must be a sign--"Get the things fecking off me!".

My $60 guitar. You better say it's chio, because now I'm so broke I'd kill you if you disagree. And yes that was incoherent. I haven't tuned it yet. Since I don't have a tuner, the only way I can tune it is by using a piano/keyboard. And although right now the piano is pretty much indisposed (by me), I'm lucky enough to have a key board--Parents to sister: "You want a keyboard? Got sale and you can learn!", Sister: "...", Parents: "We'll take it!"--so I can tune the guitar to it, because I'm sure electric keyboards don't go out of tune. Oh, and the pink and purple books are my diaries. As in keeping-things-in-check-and-organising-stuff diaries, not dear-diary-I'm-in-love diaries. The pink one was a birthday present, used for frivolous stuff, like 'PLAN BDAY CELEBS NOW!', and the purple one is for the T_T stuff, like 'PAY NTU!', or 'APPEAL TO UC BERKELEY? T_T' stuff.

You know, I can pretty much form a band, except for a drum set.

Aren't these pretty clouds? Uh, yeah, I did edit the whole thing with the edit function of my handphone. It was actually not so weirdly coloured.

My life is now so mundane that I'm sad that Housewife's Holiday has ended and they're showing some bloody show about people playing ping-pong. Hey, alliteration!

Come on, ping-pong? I mean Singapore did get a silver, whatever, but seriously, ping-pong? What the hell is that all about?

But enough about that. I can now play the F Major chord! Muahaha. I rule. Eh. But now the online lesson is getting more cheem. 12 Bar Blues is killing me, because I don't get a word the online teacher dude says. Maybe I should get lessons, haha. My auntie's colleague at the Sauce Shop (which Xumei and Sokemay, for some unknown reason, think is funny. I told Xumei that my aunt worked in a sauce-selling shop (hey, alliteration!) during one BORING econs lesson and she started laughing non-stop. O_o) has a son who's giving lessons, and at Pasir Ris some more. I thought it would be free, on account that his mum worked with my aunt. So I asked her "mian fei ah?" then she gave me a look -.-, which meant no.

Which means I probably won't be getting lessons, although I would pay to get out of my house once in a while. I'm dying! S.O.S! . . . - - - . . . I think that's morse code for SOS right?

Oh, and PSC still hasn't contacted me. I mean, okay, I am invisible (still, haha), but this is ridiculous. Maybe they haven't received my ultra large mail. Oh no.

Pff.

Chip ★ Choo ♥ Cecilia ★ Judy ♥ Linette & Yingxian ★ Jiayin ♥ Vina ★ Skins ♛ Twitter ☁ Blogger ☢ Facebook ☠ Tumblr ♐

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