Vivien ♀ Twenty one (21) English Literature Major ✎ A Gleek ♬ I love you like a love song

I am going to call the laptop service centre tonight to reformat (fo'real yo) my laptop, so that I can download some obnoxiously loud dance tracks (Party Rock Anthem comes to mind) to blast tomorrow. I'm setting out on the harrowing task of clearing out my wardrobe, because my clothes are in a state of utter patheticity. Which, apparently, is a real word according to my iPod. Who knew?

And when I'm done clearing my stuff out, I'll donate some to the Salvation Army. I mean I have some circa 2004 clothes in there and I sure as hell won't be wearing them ever again. I enjoy wearing big shirts and board shorts as much as the next tomboy-wannabe, but no use pretending I'd ever put them on and wear them out with pride anymore.

Now that I've blogged about it, it's official that I'm going to do it; honestly I've been putting the task off since the holidays started.

Today was different. Oh by the way I'm using my iPod to blog so pardon any weird sentences which don't make sense. I just came home from choir practice (just, as in I've already showered and all that) and I'm having hunger pangs, but since I don't have decent (read: junk) food in my house I'll just go to sleep soon. As I was saying, before the digression, today went rather differently. Instead of going home alone I actually ended up with an entire bunch (okay, like 10?) of choir people, which is a situation I've always strived to avoid with every fibre of my being. So anyway, there was a music comm meeting after the practice, so nobody really lingers in the studio after those; I rushed out as soon as the meeting was over, and while waiting for the bus I was hoping that they would linger and talk, or at least that no one would notice me sitting at the bus stop.

So much for hoping, the SC noticed me and came over, and before long the whole bunch of them saw her and joined her too. Eventually we all ended up on the same bus where I was thinking of how I should escape ("I'm going to buy food"? But use that too often I turn into a supper-hungry glutton, which I am but that's not the point). Besides I had to top up my card and there's the whole dilemma of should I tell them to go first or what, but that was avoided because there were two others who needed to top up their cards too.

I'll stop belabouring the point about how painfully awkward I am in such social situations. I ended up on the train with three other choir members, one of whom stays in Pasir Ris. It wasn't as bad as it could have been, and I didn't feel like blowing my brains out anytime during the talking (and the silences during which we think of things to talk about), and even the part where the other two got off and left me with a junior from alto didn't make me wish for the universe to implode. They were all nice people, and I probably could endeavour not to try so hard to avoid human contact, but hey, I'm still going to. They were all perfectly friendly, but I really can't, y'know get over the 'rebel without a cause' days. Come on, I only made friends with people who were hardened rebels against choir! Now I'm in a comm? What a sellout, yo.

Oh then at the bus interchange I wanted to buy a drink from the vending machine, but it kept spitting out my coin, so I gave up. I don't usually buy drinks but then again I don't usually talk to people on my journey home leaving me parched (I exaggerate). Point is, after giving up, this dude came up to me and was like, "Can you spare me a dollar, just now I also used the machine, the stupid machine." I guess the machine ate his coin or something, but I was confused because nobody asks people for money like that right? I thought he wanted to borrow a coin and try his luck at the machine again, and for some weird reason I thought I was going to get my money back, so I handed him the coin, after which he walked away. I just stood there staring and it suddenly struck me that I just gave money to a random stranger for no good reason. I guess he saw me staring at him with a bewildered look on my face, so he gave me a thumbs up which meant, "you're fine with giving me money for no reason right?", to which I gave a half-hearted thumbs up for, "sure, random stranger, I'm fine with giving you money for no good reason!" Anyway I wasn't going to walk there and demand he return me my dollar, and I think I was way too confused about what I just did. After a few seconds of frowning and thinking about what I just did (I was like, what just happened? Did I give money away?), I walked away thinking how surreal that was. I really didn't have a good reason, I mean he wasn't even slightly good looking so I can't say I was smitten, nor did he tell me what he needed the money for.

Really surreal, I tell you.

Today was weird.

When I grow up I'm going to live in a house with huge bookcases starting from the ground and ending at the ceiling and its shelves are going to be filled with all sorts of books, and the house is going to smell like books. And there's going to be a fluffy sofa or armchair and a small table beside it, so that I'll have a place to set my mug of Milo or milk when I read my books.

This is my 666th post on this blog. Whoa, like, total devilry, dude!

I watched Scott Pilgrim vs the World shortly after the exams ended. I thought it was going to be all hipster "I'm too cool and offbeat" but it's actually quite funny. And the little bits of video game music (Zelda!) was a reminder of how much I don't have a life fun too.

That is all. Oh, and Michael Cera looks 16.

I have finished reading all six books of the Lord of the Rings! It isn't a trilogy. And the weirdest thing is I finished The Return of the King in one sitting today, while it took me five years and several dead ends before I could finish The Two Towers, because I started in 2004 but got utterly stuck in the quagmire that was the Ents and the Helms Deep battle that I gave up before even reaching the part of the ring-bearer. I finally sat through the entire book in 2009, and the entire effort took four years longer than the time Frodo and Sam took to destroy the one ring of power.

Yeah I don't really have much to blog about because so far my life consists of choir, reading and not doing a whole lot of anything. Of course I did go out and spent about $40 in a day, despite me not working. I went out to watch Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides with Linette, Ada and Jiayin, and spent $12 on Bishi-Bashi in the arcade and more at dinner and dessert.

And surprisingly salted egg yolk ice cream isn't as bad as it sounds.

I think I keep having dreams about you people for some reason, but I can't seem to remember exactly what happens in them.

I remember the first song (or the first song I remember) I ever sang in a choir performance came from the LOTR movie, and I don't think I'll ever forget that song. It has an epic feel to it and every time a poignant moment appears in the books that song will play in my mind's ear (or something).

The story of the elves is especially sad, isn't it? They're immortal, everything they love would one day perish and all they can do is sail over the sea with nothing but memories of what they love. And there are the Ents who look forever for their Entwives but never find them, so eventually they'd all die too, wouldn't they? I've always liked books with quests in them, partly because I'm an escapist and I know I'll never be a part of anything epic, and partly because they involve travelling and growing and so far the only travelling and growing I've done is maybe grow fat(ter) on a family vacation, but even those are hard to come by nowadays.

The only way I'd die without regrets is if I have seen my share of the world, and done something I deem is meaningful, but so far, if I were to die now-

nope, not dead yet, I'd not have led a life worth living, because all I do is sit around waiting for something amazing to happen, and you all know about the story about the man who waited for the rabbit under the tree. He died. He died a horrible death.

No actually I can't remember what happened to him, but probably nothing much except maybe he finally figured out the rabbit wasn't coming. I probably will never chance upon a ring of power in a cave under the mountains while guessing at riddles, nor will my adoptive uncle leave me the one ring after he magically disappears on his birthday, and I may never journey leagues to battle evil, but I do still want something to happen, you know? Something epic and not part of this mundane capitalist grind.

But no, tomorrow I'm going to watch Friends until I puke and/or fall asleep.

Chip ★ Choo ♥ Cecilia ★ Judy ♥ Linette & Yingxian ★ Jiayin ♥ Vina ★ Skins ♛ Twitter ☁ Blogger ☢ Facebook ☠ Tumblr ♐

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